9/5/21 ^^^You have a higher conviction than me Sarah

 It seems that you are not changing your stand when comes to believing in God.

If that is the case, then we are back to the assertion that there is a cook that ignited the fire.

For the record, I have to say that I was about to discard the notion that there is God and the afterlife based on the reasons that I came up with.

However, because you are so convinced there is God and this is not the first time you assert yourself, I am willing to go ahead with your assertion and say there is God.

This God is my Big I.  He is also everybody's Big I.  Pretty much like a common OS.

For the time being, the idea of a General God had lost its appeal to me.

I am now in favor of a Personal God as in I am the God of my Universe Within.

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I wonder if I commit suicide, will I cross to the other side happier since I get there sooner?

I have this feeling that when I die, I will be walking into a room filled with people waiting to throw me a surprise party.

Then again it could be a total shut off and I wasted the remaining years of my life on premature expiration.  Pretty much like throwing away some vegetables before the *[the] expiry date. 

* I suppose in order for me to extend the expiry date, I have to keep on looking for new goals in life.

Well, that's all for tonight.

I'm going to bed.

Goodnight baby...  I love you so much.

mm